One of the best pieces of advice my dad has given me is to be mindful of the people who you surround yourself with. There are life-sucking and life-giving people. Discerning who is life-sucking or life-giving in your life can make a huge difference in your mental health.
Life-sucking people are needy and typically narcissistic. The world revolves around them, and who can help them. They do not build you up, they even sometimes find subtle ways of tearing you down.
Life-giving people will usually leave you happier than before you spoke with them. They build your spirit up. They ask questions about you, get to know the real you with interest. The relationship is equal where both people feel heard and loved.
Sometimes you can go years before realizing that someone is sucking the life out of you without your realization. If you find yourself in a life-sucking relationship then perhaps it is time to re-evaluate that relationship.
We will never recover from mood disorders if we have unsupportive, life-sucking people in our lives. If someone is tearing you down or putting their own interests way above yours, then how can you ever expect to get better? How can you build your confidence up when you are slowly being torn down? Building confidence is imperative with bipolar.
Perhaps you find some of the life-sucking qualities in yourself. That’s ok, we are all in progress. Sometimes I find life-sucking qualities in myself. Sometimes I get into a depression and fail to see what I can do for my loved ones. I’m working on it though. Change is always possible, and slowly we all can become more life-giving.
Sometimes those life-sucking people are family and you might say that you “can’t get away from them.” Well, loving someone from a distance does not mean loving them any less, it means loving and respecting yourself more.
Above all, forgiveness for those who have sucked some life out of you is exponentially important. Without true forgiveness you will be held down with bitterness and resentment. You have the control and power to forgive others.
Do you have some life-giving people in your life? I’d love to hear what others are doing to make people happy.